Sleeping
When to do it.
Good morning everybody!
I can say that genuinely, after a long long months now.
Today, I want to talk about sleep. I just woke up around 9, and it’s a multiple time that I woke up around that time in a row.
But today, I’ve noticed a change that almost like fell on me, right in the morning. I felt like doing less of mistakes.
You know, I was waking up earlier. To be precise, exactly after I first became aware of being awake. That’s the time when I woke up. However, shitty and uncomfortable I felt. Sometimes it was in the range of 3 am and 4 am. Before that, I had rule that I could still lay down. Thank god. I know. But after it. Yeah, going up, baby. “You need to stop being lazy, and wake up early.” Motivational speak noises.
I thought I need to do it, because it’s better for me. I could skip the morning people vibes in my surrounding and be calm and ready when everybody wakes up. (Yeah, the vibes weren’t good.)
And I was always like going. Go do that. Go do that. I was really productive, but also this productivity came with a price.
Everything felt like It needed to be right. Every small thing, it needed to be how it is supposed to be.
Even the simplest thing like picking up the morning t-shirt turned out to be a giant of a task. Hard. I needed to pick the right one. And if not, I was feeling a drag to go back and change it. All the way to the future, minutes later.
“You’ve made a mistake. Change it. Go back and change the fricking t-shirt. Why would you do it?! Okay, discipline, I can’t. I can’t.” The voice was so loud and acute that it was hard to resist. Everything felt like a big deal. Even the slightest things in life.
That how it looked like throughout the day. There were moments after exercise or after eating when it got better, for a moment. But other than that. Not great.
When I let myself sleep. Today for example. Didn’t try to wake up with the first glimse of awareness, if I didn’t feel like it. There was a change.
I woke up, and the first habit of mine, is dreams noting. (I want to pick just one and note that properly. Sometimes it can be too much.)
Didn’t have this usual, “you must pick the right one” feeling. There is a decision I need to make, and the decision didn’t feel so big. Decisions didn’t feel that big.
With late sleep, one goes to sleep later. I am talking 1 am later too. So keep that in mind. More internet time!
Now what it is here for you. What can you take from it.
I am not sure about what would fit you. Which sleeping time would be the best. Where you can put it. But there is a signal that I always look for when adjusting and seeing if something is good or not good for me.
I have a humour.
Giveaway
If everything feels like a big thing. If every mistake, however inconceivable small the act is, feels like a big mistake, and you need to repair it, right away, otherwise there is this feeling of hard dragging, and sadness or depression would come for you.
This constant switching of stories trying to look at the past situations whether it was a good decision or not. Whether you picked the right act, and if not, you need to know it. Because now you act again, and the situation looks similar. Oh, god! Decide fast!
Or the addiction urges, start to be so hard core. They pull you like crazy all over your day. Must do otherwise, they would come back, and even stronger.
People are so judgeable. Even though, you remeber knowing how to just have humour. And joke around. Go along. Nothing is there. You need to tell them this thing. How they should change this or that!
On and on and on.
Maybe the time when you’re going to sleep and waking up, isn’t the right fit for you. Maybe you need another time.
Experiment
When you would run an experiment, where nobody would tell you when to wake up. You would wake up when you wanted, no alarm. Granted, first you would probably sleep in, the debt only. But then, look for what time you are getting back to.
Or recall when in the young age, it’s not good to look at teenage years. There is a natural shift in waking up later, because you wanna mate outside the parent's overlook. Cool right?
Before the teenage years, there is probably a time you were more okay with. Other kids may be cool in school at 8 am, and waking up at 6 am or whatever. But you. You were the last one going there. You always felt like a bit more sleep would be great.
See? That thing.
You know, when I doubt the sleeping time, what gives me confidence is the well, feeling less heavy. Whatever you do, especially in the decision apartment, it doesn’t spark such a hardcore emotional response.
The best would be if you would go to some place, nobody would be there to influence you, and you would just sleep there. Tent and stuff. Look where is your normal time. Okay, it would need to be safe for you, or you feel safe in it. So you can get natural. And you would need a bit time, off the screens. And then let your body pick, what it would be.
Or you can just think of where is the pull. Stop the whole, “get hard motherfuker! Don’t be a pussy” and those thoughts. Just where does the tiredness point out your time is.
Granted, the food you eat influences it too. It’s all connected, and I have a hard time writing it all at the same time. The other habit pillars, food and exercise are in the background now, and we talked about the sleep one. And yet, they are interconnected, and each change make a change there. You know.
So whatever you take from this article, I hope you would have more lightness into decision-making. Not, ‘not caring’, but caring with a niceness in it.
Biee, Luke.
